Dear diary, You can’t force love. I’ve tried. Well maybe not love, but a crush. I wanted desperately for our meet-cute to be my story, our story. Have you ever forced a door opened and gotten in? I have. Have you ever forced a friend to go to a Tuesday happy hour because “why the hell not?” Guilty again. …
Recently I’ve been on some pretty great dates. Only, there’s a catch. He’s moving in a couple weeks. And it’s not one of those chill ten minutes away move; it’s a life move. When we went out last week we talked about how the next time we’d see each other would be our last date, and probably the last time we ever saw each other.
I fucked up. In a big way. I hooked up with a coworker, gave him false hope, crushed his soul, hooked up with him again, refused to even go on a date with him, then crushed his soul again. And we still sit next to each other eight hours a day, five days a week.
I gave up dating for Lent. Truth be told, it was a conservative sacrifice but ultimately it has led to some interesting observations. I’ve had some enlightening moments, some dark moments, and some really bland ones that I’ve made sure to capture over the past ~35 days.
Anonymity is part of the allure of online dating…But that’s not always the case in DC. There may be many fish in the sea, but DC is less like a sea and more like a mid-sized fish tank. You brush past a lot of the same fish.
It was early spring and he planned for us to have a Saturday pool date. Come Friday, though, the forecast for Saturday showed rain with a high of 60, so I suggested we see a movie instead. He responded, “We’ll make the decision about whether or not we go to the movies when you arrive. Hopefully by that time the sun will be out and I can see you in a bathing suit.”
Do I have feelings for this guy or am I holding myself back from meeting someone better? If I’m questioning it so much does that mean it’s not right? Or am I just not giving it a chance? Do I actually like the guy or do I just like having a boy to talk to?